March 31, 2013

RE-VERSE: GAME OF THRONES

An angry White Walker. Perhaps he's been forced to sit through a full season of GAME OF THRONES. CLICK to visit the official site.

IN TWEET: A RE-VERSE IS A REVIEW WRITTEN IN VERSE. FOR THE FIRST OUTING OF THIS NEW RONTHINK FEATURE, WE CHOSE “GAME OF THRONES” FROM HBO.

Sometimes when you want to write a negative review, turning it into a poem can make the bitter pill go down a little easier. I know many of my fellow geeks love the HBO series GAME OF THRONES. Alas, I’m not one of them.

GAME OF THRONES has everything I dislike in one hugely overblown snoozer of a package: dragons, dirty looking characters wearing pelts, storylines that are deliberately confusing for no valid reason, a deep well of smug self-importance, ugly people having kinky sex, fantasy novel roots, excessive violence and Peter Dinklage.

So, without further pontification, here is the inaugural RONTHINK RE-VERSE!

Angry bastard Joffrey. I'd behead people too if I looked like an androgynous in-bred albino. CLICK to visit the official GAME OF THRONES site.

GAME OF THRONES

A DARK SONNET OF RHYMING COUPLETS

Tonight White Walkers march once more.

Hark! Here comes that crashing bore!

As GIRLS lays waste to comedy

This is death by fantasy.

The cast be large, the critics mused.

Whilst I sat there dazed and confused.

Geekdom is moist with so much love

But I suggest death from above.

For on this turgid GAME OF THRONES

I would launch Obama’s drones.

Season 3 of GAME OF THRONES debuts tonight (Sunday, March 31) on HBO at 9pm E/P.

CLICK to buy GAME OF THRONES on DVD and Blu-ray from Amazon. CLICK to rent S2 episodes of GAME OF THRONES from Amazon Instant Video.